November 14, 2014
I have no plans to ever divorce Beth, but if I did, the reason line would simply read, "Party Rockers in the House Tonight."
It's not that Beth had a party last night and Jon Bon Jovi just would not take the hint to leave. Excuse me Jon, we are all out of queso.
The fact of the matter is that I have had an ear worm all day of little Julia channeling her voice through Aunt Beth singing some LMFAO lyrics.
Beth assures me it is adorable and I would like it if I had ever heard it, but I'm not buying it.
So has everyone else shirked their housework today to play some COD Black Ops II? I sure have. I did not think it was going to be an issue until I swooped into the dining room and saw something move in the corner. Since I am home alone, I took issue with that. Then I realized it was simply the dust bunnies circling the wagons as they planned a coup. Since their numbers were nearing something that could take down Gulliver, I thought I better break out the vacuum.
I made the purchase at my old Target this morning and got to see some of my former coworkers. Man I really miss those guys, but not so much The Target. They remembered me and treated it like a celebrity sighting similar to when Nick Lachey or Tonya O'Rourke stops by. I know you don't know Tonya, but look back at some early posts of mine and my affection for her is explained. Fortunately, she never reciprocated or turning her down would have made for an awkward situation.
While at The Target, I was made aware that some of these guys have taken to reading my blog. I was actually told this as I texted with a past coworker who has moved to Columbus but shares the same Xavier alumni status as myself. Since I knew she was someone I could celebrate last night's victory with, I texted her. She let me know of the blog stalking. I did not believe her since I have never seen a lot of action on Feedjit suggesting an increase in readership and have certainly never seen a comment from these stalkers. However, I was assured today that some of them actually do read. One even used the term witty. I'm guessing they did not read yesterday's post.
Therefore, my first reaction when I heard this was concern. Had I said anything that may have offended upon my departure? I had no reason to, but could something have been taken wrong? Sarcasm is sometimes misunderstood. Nonetheless, they assured me that nothing like that had happened. Good.
Therefore, I will include in here, out of earshot, that I was a little upset with the people I saw today. They looked a little too good. The store looked too good. It was fairly obvious that I have not been missed. The team lead I used to call Yoda had lost weight and looked happy. The Manager of the front also looked thinner and tanner, and not stressed. The team out on the floor looked like they had no worries about next week. All the while, I looked in the mirror at home and saw that I still have gray hair and pimples and dark circles. Not fair. Especially the gray hair with pimples part.
Perhaps I need to return to The Target. NOT!!!!!
I know that things are good for me and I am certainly not hoping that things are bad for my old work mates. I hope all of you in retail and elsewhere are ready for a good holiday season filled with blessings and good tidings. You know, comfort and joy and all that. And if you are expecting company-aka Jon Bon Jovi-make sure you have plenty of queso.