Tuesday, August 9, 2011

It was like the blonde leading the blind

August 9, 2011

I have new follower!  Why is this soooo exciting when I have such awesome followers already?  Two reasons.  One, it skyrockets my number of followers to 11 which is almost double digits.  Second, it is Duffylou who has come over from http://byebyepie.typepad.com/bye_bye_pie/  and has frequently made me snort in the comments over there.  Welcome!

Speaking of snorting, Katie from http://twelvedaysold.blogspot.com/ can "allegedly" hook you up with some crack if you are in the market.  Does one even snort crack?  Not sure, check with Katie.

Who is the best husband around?  It's my blog, so I nominate me.

Yesterday, I took Beth, CJ, and Beth's mom to see Great Aunt Retta, the nun.  She is 97 years old and still teaching!  Not really.  She is 97, but is retired.  She is still spunky but does not get around like she used to.  Geees, I am 46  and I don't get around like I used to.  She is a real joy to visit as she never has a negative thing to say, she lived an exciting life, and she thinks I am one of the most handsome men she ever met.  Right up there with her dad and Jesus.

What proved to need some work is how CJ deals with old people.  As I observed his obvious boredom as Retta told us a story she has told us before, I realized I would be old soon enough and CJ would need to be a little nicer to me than he was being with Retta.  It also came back to me that as we walked to Retta's room, CJ had walked through a door opened by his 77 year old grandma as if it was okay for her to hold a door for him.  This got corrected right away.

Later on in the day, Beth decided that we should go to a park down by the river and it turned out to be a great idea.  Beth and her mom strolled and talked (or bickered, whatever moms and daughters do), while CJ and I walked and talked.  Interspersed with our conversation about zombies and video games and who could throw a rock farther, we discussed how one handles being around older people. 

I explained that when I moved back in with him when I turned 80, he was going to have to listen to my stories as if he had never heard them before, he would have to put up with my walker being in the way, and he would have to take mom to the grocery for me as she would still be as spunky as ever.  AND,  he would have to push the cart and open doors and carry the bags and look at her butt and drive the car and pick out the cereal.  In other words, all the things I am responsible for now. 

Yes, he did catch me on the butt thing and all butts may be off. 

In other news, Beth found a spot in our attic where she confirmed that we had a leak where a pipe meets the roof.  We had a heavy rain last night and water was dripping down the outside of the pipe from the roof to the basement.  It may be time to move.  Darn it.

We went to a freshman orientation at the high school last night to meet the administration and learn about being a freshman.  The funniest part was the explanation of the dress code and how none of the shorts the girls were wearing to orientation met the length requirement.  It was also humerous how CJ's girlfriend blew him off as they walked by each other and he was like "whaaaa?"  I don't know dude, you don't talk to her all summer and she gets mad?  Go figure.  Women are strange.

Finally, we went to CJ's locker while he went back to band practice, and we tried to open it.  We could not get it open.  The neighboring teens thought we were lame until we had them try the combination and it did not work for them either.  The two girls who tried it for us were both blonde, so between old people and blonde girls we were out of luck.  We were going to try the math geek who walked by, but CJ got a top locker and math geek was too short to reach it. 

It brought back high school age memories for me as I was the math geek, and I could not get blonde girls to open anything for me.


  1. Freshman orientation, how exciting! I really hope you didn't tell CJ that actual people saw you being losers. School hasn't even started yet, already he's lost street cred.

  2. Ugh, orientation. I remember one year I hung out with my friend's family one weekend and I had met her brother's girlfriend. The girlfriend was working the orientation table the next day and when I said hi to her she ignored me and I wanted to crawl under the table and die. I liked high school and all, but I'm glad that's over with. At least now I would stand up for myself and say, "What, you don't remember me from yesterday?" Also I would have talked back to the teacher who told me I had "so much potential and yet it's like pouring wine into a sock".

    And I may still get unjust criticisms at work, but at least I'm getting paid for it.

  3. Hey Target Steve! You're as big of a crackup on here as you are at the Pie. And speaking of crack, I am sure my lovely Katie/12 Days Old can get you the very best crack, if you needed it for like your son's science experiment or anything.

    And you might jest about the 97 year old nun teacher, but back in my Catholic school days that was the average age of the nuns at my school.

    Also too, you remind me of my good friend Cheeseboy, who's a blogger. I think you should go read him, you two could be great friends. I have found that men bloggers really appreciate another man blogger as they swim through the estrogen laden seas of blogging. Here's a link to one of his posts about Target. If you end up being best man friends, please make sure you let everyone know I was the one who set you two up.