Do waiters/waitresses have a union?

April 18, 2010

There is a site here in Cincinnati, or perhaps everywhere, I don't know, called Groupon.  You can order half price gift certificates if enough people order them.  They have to be posted, of course.  You can't just pick a place and say that a whole bunch of us want a gift certificate, and then they make them available.

So the one from last week was for The Original Pancake House.  If you are ever in Cincinnati, you have to go there.  It is in Montgomery and is de.lis.cious.  There are times when you may have to wait a bit as it is not that large, but if you have the time, it is worth it.  So we went on Saturday with our $20 gift certificate voucher thingy.  We ate exactly $20 worth of food, which was a pure coincidence.  We tipped based on our $20 tab, so we did right by our waitress.

All this info is to preface the fact that CJ wants to put the wait staff out of business.  He bears no ill will towards them, he has just come up with an idea that makes them expendable.  He has a thought that if there were some I-Pad type thing in the middle of your table, you could just come in and place your order without needing a waiter person.  There would still need to be cooks and hostesses and someone to bring your stuff to your table, but otherwise it eliminates some of the need for a waiter.

I am only putting waiter in now instead of waitress only because it is shorter to type, not because I prefer one or the other.  Please do not lick all of my food if you are a female in the waiting business.

Of course, by typing this long explanation, I suppose I could have just kept typing waiter/waitress.  Yeah, I'm pretty smart.

I told CJ that this may be easier for places with smaller or not so complicated menus, but do places like that exist anymore?  Even McDonalds' menu is pretty complicated for some people.  It must be, or why are some customers taking so long to order.  Most of the menu hasn't changed for a hundred years, but the guy in front of me is always staring at the menu board like he's hoping there is some new item, like McPasta up there. 

We love Chipotle because the food is great and there is no tipping since you order your food at the counter and they hook you up right there.  Everything is simple and you can see what you want and pick it quickly.  What I always want is a burrito bowl with rice, black beans, carnitas, sour cream, cheese, guacamole, and lettuce.  Sometimes I throw corn on there, but it depends on which Chipotle we are visiting.  The one we go to makes it spicier than the other.  I figured you all needed to know this if you were ever coming to visit and wanted to pick me up something on the way over.  Please have them put the corn on the side.

So, does it seem possible to go into an Applebees and sit at your table, order on a computer, and then see your food show up just as you expected it?  Can it be done?  Or will the cook who is dating the waitress you put out of a job load you up with extra onions and a couple cockroaches just for flavor? 

CJ wants me to add, "Will it blend?" as a question to ask.  Where does he get the idea that random questions can be inserted just anywhere into this blog?  Beats me.

So let me know what you think of CJ's idea.  Do I still need to save for his college education, or will he be a rich entrepeneur very soon?  Or is trade school still in the picture?