Saturday, December 8, 2012

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel...

December 8, 2012

CJ is shooting pigeons today.  It's not like he has never shot anything before.  I have seen him shoot countless men-all in self defense mind you-playing video games.  Plenty of zombies as well.  But pigeons? 

Ah, with a camera, some of you have surmised.  Because you are so clever.  No, CJ is going with his girlfriend and her dad today to shoot pigeons. 

Apparently, her father likes to shoot weapons and has taught his daughter how to handle a gun.  Whenever the topic came up before, Beth and I would dismiss the shooting talk assuming her dad would never want to take CJ along and ruin their father-daughter bonding.  However, CJ got an invite this week.  He looked at me and asked if he could go.  Beth wasn't there so I knew I could not provide him with the final answer, but I assumed a trip to the firing range to squeeze off some rounds from a glock would not be harmful.

Before we go any further, I should make known my stance on gun control. 

I have no stance.  I have never had to take a stance.  Most people have their opinions about stuff formed by influences in their lives.  Or the Internet.  Either their parents pass on their opinions, or there comes a turning point in your life that shapes your opinion.  If you know someone who has been shot and better gun control laws could have saved them, I would guess you are rather anti guns.  If you have ever been attacked by a bear and a gun would have saved your life, you are probably pro guns.  If you ever had to listen to your neighbor's new dog bark all day every day, you may be pro guns.

NO!  I WOULD NEVER SHOOT A DOG!  JUST KIDDING! 

But I am trying to find a way to purchase mail order doggy downers without it getting traced back to my account.  Perhaps I should not have shared that information on a blog.

Anyway, my dad taught me as much about guns as he taught me about camping which is the same amount I learned from him about tools.  Nada.  Zilch. 

Fortunately, I have never been attacked by a bear.  I was once attacked by a bee, but I fought him off with an open Ketchup packet much to the chagrin of the gentleman sitting next to me at the picnic.  He looked like he had been in a gun fight after I got rid of that bee.  If I had fought it off with a hand gun, I am quite sure this man's family would be anti gun.  Guns don't kill people, bees kill people.

But I digress.  It seems that Beth has had no opinion formed about guns in her lifetime either, except that someone used one to shoot JR and that Gibbs is really good with a sniper rifle.

So we said yes.  I mean, who is going to miss a few pigeons?  Mr Girlfriend's Dad said they only cost $10 to shoot at like 90 pigeons.  And CJ should not expect to hit any anyway.  Apparently, pigeons can be pretty crafty in flight.  So what's the harm? 

So he is going.  I have offered to take him out this morning to Bass Pro Shops to purchase one of those plaid hats with the ear flaps.  Or one of those barn jackets with random patches on the sleeves.  He has declined my offer.

Beth has shared two pieces of advice with him regarding today's activities.  First, don't shoot any humans.  Second, don't get shot by any humans.  I would rather he not get shot by any pigeons, but I am being told their primary self defense mechanism does not involve weaponry.  I guess we will find out.

So CJ leaves in an hour if you have an opinion you want to share.  And in case you are love all animals including flying vermin, please reread my title before yelling at me about CJ shooting live pigeons.

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