Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Idiot prevention devices, priceless.

December 6, 2011

The rain has stopped for now which is good because Noah needs some time to finish his work.  We have had over 96 inches of rain this year in Cincinnati which is 30 inches more than a normal year.  I am hoping that means we are due for some dry times as continuing this trend with cold weather coming would spell disaster for this town.  Cincinnatians do not handle snow well.  That is partly due to the fact that the temperature is usually hovering around the freezing mark and the beginning of the precipitation is usually in the form of ice.  Ice under snow is bad news. 

Couple that with the reality that drivers around here have issues with dry pavement and you got trouble right here in river city.  When we get bad driving conditions here, there are two types of drivers that hit the road.  The first thinks you have to drive 20mph and keep your right turn signal on the whole time, and the second takes a toboggan approach and drives faster so you can get to the bottom of the hill quicker.  These two techniques do not mix well.  Like ice and rain.  Or fire and rain.  James Taylor was on drugs, right?

Part of the issue is that a lot of us drive SUVs now.  I have one too, and I realize that I count on the 4 wheel drive feature to keep me out of trouble.  I drive up a hill in the rain counting on my 4 wheel drive to kick in.  This is a feature I do not understand.

The vehicle's computer is so smart it can sense when it needs the other 2 wheels to have pulling power.  I don't understand it, but I am forever grateful for how smart vehicles have become.  Whomever came up with the feature that makes the car ding at you when you leave your lights on-love that person.  And the person who made it so that you cannot take your keys out of the ignition unless your car is in park.  Hugs.

I know it is sad that I need these features, but I do.  Every year, around this time, I used to have an issue with my car.  Every year it came down to me being tired and burned out and doing something stupid.

Like the one year when I tried to leave work and my car would not start.  It was late at night and I ended up having to stay over at one of the other manager's house since I worked 40 minutes from my apartment.  That meant wearing the same clothes to work the next day and not shaving.  I looked good.

"Fortunately", the store for which I was employed, had a auto repair place attached.  They towed my car into the garage.  They came to find me later with good news and bad news.

Good news:  The reason your car would not start is that you left it in drive.

Bad news:  The fee for being an idiot is $25.

I figure whatever I have had to pay extra for in a vehicle over the years for features that protect me from idiot fees, have probably balanced out.

That was a nice gramatically correct sentence, huh?

I am going to take care of some Christmas shopping and wrapping before Beth get's home.  Don't tell her, but I am getting her a piece of chocolate but wrapping it in an extra large box.  Snicker.


  1. You know I have great admiration for you, but...people who drive SUVs have to remember the rest of the population does not necessarily have 4 wheel drive. In fact some of us, not pointing fingers or raising hands, drive rear wheel drive cars in the snow. ahem. That is all.

  2. So you're the one I always see doing donuts on your way through the intersection...


  3. Me? Donuts? I laugh, ha ha, at the thought. Now if you see a gray Mustang fish tailing...


  4. I thought that was your backend swaying in front of me...

    Can I drive your Mustang sometime?


  5. You can drive my Mustang as long as I don't have to drive a minivan.